Lizzo, A Toast | The Flops

In the first edition of The Flops (2026), we examine the questionable “A Toast” recorded by Grammy-winning pop singer-songwriter Lizzo. 

Like damn, bruh! Sis! C’mon! You thought it was bound to hit, but instead it was total shit – nothing but dookie 💩!  The songs that appear in The Flops didn’t hit, or the perception by many is that they underperformed or underwhelmed for a given artist.  Flops are even more detrimental when the artist is considered a superstar and rarely misses the mark. Flops can even be successful, even if the quality sucked. Or maybe they’re not-so-bad, but they bombed on the charts.  Regardless, this is the column to highlight abject failure. In the first edition of The Flops (2026), we examine the questionable “A Toast” recorded by Lizzo.

In the year of our Lord 2026, a Grammy-winning pop ‘superstar,’ Lizzo, released a new album.  The new LP, wholesomely titled BITCH went nowhere. It fell flat as a pancake and didn’t even sniff the Billboard 200. I’m not shocked, and despite a more favorable view of the lead single than most, I cautioned that “Lizzo uses bitch far too much in too many of her songs… It’s difficult to conjure up a pop hit with a swear word, even given the explicit musical landscape of the 2020s.” Also, 2025’s mixtape, MY FACE HURTS FROM SMILING, failed to chart. More difficult for Lizzo is her fall from grace, as well as diminished appetite for her brand of music.  I wasn’t enthused, and I’ve enjoyed Melissa Jefferson, sigh.  Empowerment, unfortunately, may not be the aesthetic. While BITCH  as a whole deserves a shout-out on The Flops, one of the most maligned songs was the opener, “A Toast”.  It went viral… for all of the wrong reasons. Lizzo, Ricky Reed, Nate Mercereau, Ben Darwish, and Emily Warren composed this bish 🤭. Mercereau, Darwish, and Reed produced it.

TikTok ate “A Toast” up. No, strike that – they ate it dafuq up 😳!

@gobeyy

might be the worst song I’ve ever heard #lizzo

♬ A Toast – Lizzo

Peep the comments 👀… BRUTAL 😬.  The question is: is “A Toast” THAT bad? Well, while Lizzo attempts to sound at least semi-sophisticated, with the classical-tinged accompaniment, she also gets in her own way. I won’t judge the production, though TikTok had enough to say about how the music sounds. Starting with the second verse, the bitch comes out: “Bitches tap dancing on my last nerves, ooh / But I digress, just another test.” Ugh… It’s one of many lines that irk. I get what she was going for, but the bitching doesn’t help and, arguably, hurts her message. Lizzo doesn’t stop there, dropping empowerment in another bitchy sort of way: “Just a day in the life of an aspirational bad bitch / I’m doing my best / At least I know I tried; I can’t say that for you.” Hmm. An aspirational bad bitch? Is that what we are calling strong, independent women now, I assume? To each her own, I suppose.  You can credit her in the first verse for “Letting go, just to free my mind / ‘Cause I’m finally who I said I’d be for the first time.” But unless you’re a die-hard Lizzo stan, it’s easy to see why “A Toast” got clowned.  There’s potential, but the execution, along with this Lizzo’s damaged reputation, dooms “A Toast”… and BITCH. Also, speaking for the entire album, the cover art was a very bad idea.  A FLOP? YUP, BIG TIME!

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Lizzo » BITCH » Nice Life Recording / Atlantic Recording Corporation » 2026

Lizzo, A Toast: The Flops No. 1 (2026) [📷: Brent Faulkner / The Musical Hype; Nice Life Recording / Atlantic Recording Corporation; Will Oliveira from Pexels; Gordon Johnson, OpenClipart-Vectors from Pixabay]

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