13 Totally B!+chin’ Songs | Playlist 🎧

1. Lana Del Rey, “Venice Bitch”

Norman Fucking Rockwell! • Interscope • 2019

Some people love Lana Del Rey, while others are mixed.  She’s a truly polarizing musician, yet, musically, the Grammy-nominated alternative pop singer/songwriter has quite a distinct, beautiful musical instrument.  Darkly asserting “I wish I was dead already” some years back, thankfully, Del Rey was definitely alive delivering her best music to date on her sixth studio album, Norman Fucking Rockwell! (2019).  Furthermore, the song at hand, “Venice Bitch”, is among the crème de la crème of NFR!.

“Venice Bitch” clocks in at nearly 10 minutes!  Despite being exhaustive, there’s lots to like about record. Lana Del Rey and the musicians opt for an organic sound that opts against being commercial. Del Rey spoils us with her vocal tone. Reverb does her voice wonders, adding more robustness. The accompaniment is lovely, with the guitars embracing a folksy sound idiomatic of alt-pop. The chorus is a pro:

“Oh God, miss you on the lips
It’s me, your little Venice bitch
On the stoop with the neighborhood kids
Callin’ out, bang bang, kiss kiss.”

There’s also a noteworthy post-chorus, which includes the lyrics, “Nothing gold can stay / You write, I tour, we make it work / You’re beautiful and I’m insane / We’re American-made.”  The bridge is a selling point, specifically how the intensity picks up by adding drums and elevating the dynamic level. Furthermore, you have to admire the old-school, throwback quality of this record, which would have easily felt at home in the 60s given its psychedelia cues and vibe.  It runs absolutely too long, but it’s certainly worthwhile.

2. Lennon Stella, “BITCH (takes one to know one)”

BITCH (takes one to know one) [Single] • RECORDS, LLC / Columbia • 2019

“You do the things you do, oh God / You know what they say / It takes a bitch to know a bitch / It takes a bitch to know a bitch.” Never underestimate the power of shock value.  Without context, a record like “BITCH (takes one to know one)” sounds totally risqué to the nth degree, thanks to its reference to a ‘female dog.’ But Lennon Stella isn’t being intentionally risqué or setting to her own sex back through the use of the infamous five-letter word, but rather she exhibits female power.

Throughout the course of “BITCH,” Lennon Stella seems to be totally disgusted by the behavior men can exhibit.  It begins with the first line of the first verse, where Stella criticizes his tasteless humor – “Driving through the canyon, you said it like a joke / … I know you won’t apologize / You sent me down the river to see if I would float away.”  Her disdain continues on the second verse, where it’s clear that she’s still pissed off, despite him brushing it off.

“You walk into the party, you’re laughing with our friends
You make it look so easy, but I just can’t pretend
How can you act like everything’s alright…?
Somebody take this weight away.” 

Ugh, the bro totally messed up, and Lennon Stella takes matters into her own hands – get it girl!  Musically, “BITCH (takes one to know one)” is respectably produced, and Stella sings well.  Still, it’s the messaging, sort of a bold means of female empowerment, that serves as the crowning achievement of this pop joint. “BITCH (takes one to know one)” previously appeared on the playlist 11 Awesome Songs that Tickled My Fancy in March 2019.

3. Mitchell Tenpenny, “Bitches”

Telling All My Secrets • Riser House Entertainment • 2018

“Well, I don’t deal with bitches no more / I could call you crazy, curse your name / Throw your shit out the door / But I don’t deal with bitches no more.” Wow…  Sort of hard to believe that Mitchell Tenpenny is one of those clean-cut, ‘limited profanity’ beings known as country artists.  To Tenpenny’s defense, like much of popular music, country music is taking more risks, which includes becoming more profane.  Still, one doesn’t expect “Bitches” to appear on a country album, let alone a debut country album. Honestly, I wanted to use the totally bitching “Bitches” before, but sadly, it didn’t fit the criteria of the playlist, 13 Worthwhile, Incredibly Telling Songs.  Now, with a distasteful playlist dedicated to the female dog, “Bitches” is a perfect fit.

Of course, Mitchell Tenpenny isn’t talking about female dogs.  On the first verse, he calls her a cheater essentially, as he sings, “Yeah, you got caught kissing another guitar-picking bro / Says you’re the once he’s singing about.” One the second verse, he denounces “The kind [of love] you’re making with every guy in this club…” Obviously, both lead to the shocking chorus mentioned above. For further confirmation, on the bridge, he mentions her reputation, and is happy to have found her out and be rid of her:

“Now I love this peace and quite
No lying, cheating, fighting
Just me, myself, and these guitar strings.”

4. Tove Lo, “bitches”

Ft. Charli XCX, Icona Pop, Elliphant & ALMA

Bitches – Single • Universal • 2018

Swedish artist Tove Lo always seems to ‘push the envelope.’ A perfect example arrives via “bitches”, the seventh track from her 2017 album, BLUE LIPS (lady wood phase II).  In 2018, Tove Lo returned with a remix of the record, featuring Charli XCX, Icona Pop, Elliphant, and ALMA.  The song explores lesbianism (Tove Lo is bisexual).  She starts things off bluntly with lines like “Know your own love, I don’t fuck with no glove” and “Let me be your guide when you eat my pussy out.” Charli XCX, drops in for the pre-chorus asserting, “All the girls stare at me, drop lip / Dripping in harmony, like Fifth.”

Joined by Tove Lo, they deliver the ‘filter-less’ hook:

“Bitches, I don’t trust ‘em
But they give me what I want for the night
Bitches, I don’t trust ‘em
But I tell ‘em and they do what I like.”

Icona Pop arrives for the second verse, ending with a bang: “So, baby, spread your legs, I’ll do the same, already cumming.” On the third verse, Elliphant and ALMA trade solo lines, while also performing alongside Tove Lo.  So, what does one make of this blunt record? Depends on who you are, where you are, and what your perspectives are.  What is clear is that Tove Lo isn’t afraid to speak about her sexuality and manages to get unique pop single out of it. “Bitches” previously appeared on the playlist Totally Awesome LGBTQ+ Songs Beaming With Pride.

5. Billie Eilish, “Bitches Broken Hearts”

Bitches Broken Hearts [Single] • Darkroom / Interscope • 2018

“Everybody knows / You and I are suicide and stolen art.”  Word.  Shock value can be a great promo tool for a rising artist. Teen alternative pop musician Billie Eilish raised eyebrows with her boldly titled single, “Bitches Broken Hearts”. Ultimately, “Bitches Broken Hearts” isn’t quite as brash as the title might suggest though it certainly has a couple of lines that are ‘punchy.’ A prime example comes by way of “Pretty mama sews / Stitches into all your bitches broken hearts.” What’s the theme of the record?  Billie is brokenhearted, and she ultimately wants to believe, or wants her ex- to admit, he misses her. The heartbrokenness is captured via cool, minimalist production.

Billie Eilish matches the simplicity of the production with her own cool, restrained brand of vocals.  While holding back can be boring at times, Eilish makes her performance worthwhile.  She has a beautiful instrument, which complements the simple, yet impactful backdrop soundly.  The centerpiece is the chorus, which arrives at the jump.

“You can pretend you don’t miss me
You can pretend you don’t care
All you wanna do is kiss me
Oh, what a shame, I’m not there.” 

All in all, Eilish shined on “Bitches Broken Hearts,” a great preface to her brilliant, full-length debut, WHEN WE ALL FALL ASLEEP, WHERE DO WE GO?.

6. Post Malone, “Same Bitches”

Ft. G-Eazy & YG

Beerbongs & Bentleys • Republic • 2018

“I been in L.A. too long / How I see the same bitches everywhere I go?” Typical of hip-hop culture, Post Malone refers to women as bitches… ugh! Of course, some would make the argument that the word isn’t meant with disrespect in certain contexts, but PM is definitely writing off the women he sees.  Basically, on “Same Bitches” (Beerbongs & Bentleys) he’s tired of seeing the same type of shallow women – he’s ‘been there, done that’.

In one respect, Post Malone is slightly more thoughtful… slightly being key: “I know you wanna live this life / But I can’t make a ho a housewife.” Basically, this passage from his first verse suggests that he’s looking for a genuine woman who isn’t shallow – he’s not willing to commit to someone with a ‘bad reputation.’  Of course, G-Eazy plays off of Post on the second verse:

“Everywhere I go I see the same ho
Always post selfies on the ‘Gram from a angle, a Catfish
Hollywood devil, not a angel
Her bag is Chanel, but she drives a Durango.”

Eazy’s grammar is not good (“an” man, AN!), but his point is clearly executed, nonetheless. YG follows suit (“I been in L.A.  too long / Me and my bros hit the same hoes”), going on to detail her resume:

“She fucked the L.A. Laker for the record
She fucked a Dodger baseball player for the record
She fucked the head of my record label, ooh
How you think she been so stable?”

If you follow the three rappers’ argument, the characterization of ‘same bitches’ is earned. 

7. Shordie Shordie, “Bitchuary”

Captain Hook • D1 Entertainment / Warner Records • 2018

“Bitch, you a dog and your homegirl too, ayy / She hit me back, like, ‘Your dawg is too,’ ayy / We can meet up, we can meet in groups, ayy / With you and I, it can be us two like…” Sometimes, a song catches your attention thanks to a wild-ass, extravagant title.  That’s exactly why “Bitchuary” earns a spot on this b-word heavy list.  The popular record arrived courtesy of Shordie Shordie on his 2018 mixtape, Captain Hook, appearing as the ninth track.  Shordie Shordie keeps its short, as “Bitchuary” clocks in at a mere two-minutes-and-15 seconds.

As expected, this is NOT the cleanest song you’ll ever hear, repeating ‘bitch’ an ample amount throughout, in various contexts.  Starting early on, and the risqué happenings, well, they commence of course! “Know when I leave, you be goin’, seein’ different faces / But when I leave, I be fuckin’ bitches, different places…” That’s pretty cut and dry, right? Later, within the same verse (verse one), he insults fakes, implying they’re ‘bitches’ essentially (“And he ain’t no gangster, he just an actress”), before switching things up with sexual references (“And when you suckin’ the D, I tell you catch this”).  Whoa! Beyond the wild title and filthy lyrics, what makes “Bitchuary” stand out is the unique delivery and idiosyncrasy of the Baltimore rapper himself – he’s quite interesting.

8. Bhad Bhabie, “Hi Bich”

15 • Bhad Bhabie • 2018

A troubled teen (Danielle Bregoli) reborn as a rapper (Bhad Bhabie) could totally work, right? Umm… Honestly, it’s situations like these that make me lose faith in the music industry.  Essentially, Bhad Bhabie is a product of a viral moment on Dr. Phil, specifically because she infamously said, “Cash me outside.” Yuck, which also rhymes with another word, when adding an -ing ending, combined with the word “mess,” accurately describes the whole persona that is Bhad Bhabie. Anyways, for some reason, I’m including “Hi Bich” on this bitching playlist, despite the fact that someone forgot to tell Bregoli to at least include the ‘t’ when spelling the word, SMDH. Mostly, it’s the perfect opportunity to be ‘bitchy.’

The good news is that “Hi Bich” is only one-minute and forty-five seconds long. The production is simple, but gives ‘Bhad Bhabie’ a malicious, unapologetic backdrop to rap over. At least the incorrectly spelled titular line, “hi bich,” is catchy. Mostly though, “Hi Bich” is as much of a hot mess as you would expect. The rapping is incredibly corny, lacking any redeeming qualities in my ‘bitchy’ eyes. Simply put, “Hi Bich” is basic AF.

9. Dreezy, “Bad Bitch”

No Hard Feelings • Interscope • 2016

“Bad bitch / I’m slaying all these hos, I’m a savage / Ain’t with no basic shit, I’m not your average / Feelin’ like I’m Kobe, I ain’t giving niggas passes.”  Rapper/singer Dreezy had a hit song in 2017 with “Body,” collaborating with “Birthday Sex” and “Down on Me” R&B standout Jeremih.  Unfortunately, she couldn’t ride the wave of the hit to success for the album, No Hard Feelings, which was far from a commercial success.  As great as “Body” is, No Hard Feelings also had some other gems, including “Bad Bitch,” where the aforementioned, savage lyrics are excerpted from.

“Gave mercy to these hoes, what would Jesus do?
Somebody got to take a loss, shit it was me or you
Mean mugging in the Ghost, they yellin’ Beetlejuice
My niggas with me got more stripes than an Adidas suit.”

“Body” is great, but arguably, no moment shines brighter than “Bad Bitch.” Why? On this electrifying gem, Dreezy is on autopilot, no questions asked. She spits over a relatively simple, but highly effective looped production, painting magnificent, unapologetic rhymes. Safe to say, Dreezy “gives no fucks” whatsoever.

10. Rihanna, “Bitch Better Have My Money”

Bitch Better Have My Money • Westbury Road Entertainment / Roc Nation • 2015

“Bitch better have my money / Y’all should know me well enough / Bitch better have my money / Please don’t call me on my bluff.” In other words, if you think that Rihanna is playing with y’all, she ain’t.  The Grammy-winning urban contemporary artist practically screams her brash, unapologetic, 2015 single, “Bitch Better Have My Money.”

Again, can’t emphasize enough that Rihanna is definitely NOT playing – “bitch better have my money!” For whatever reason, the colorful joint never made an album.  Perhaps Ri Ri didn’t feel like it was a fit for her fine, 2016 LP, Anti.  And honestly, I can’t blame her.  Even though Anti has bold moments, it’s hard to imagine “Bitch Better Have My Money” being anything more than an ill-fitting bonus cut. Even more colorful and controversial than the single itself is the NSFW music video – it’s definitely something! The “BBHMM” video includes nudity, drugs, blood, and of course, plenty of money.

11. Britney Spears, “Work B**ch”

Britney Jean • RCA • 2013

“Work B**ch,” one of the few highlights from Britney Jean (2013), shows a more risqué, unapologetic Britney Spears… sort of.  Take a closer look at a seemingly ‘shallow’ message from Spears on the chorus: “You want a hot body? You want a Bugatti? / You want a Maserati? You better work bitch / You want a Lamborghini? Sip martinis? / Look hot in a bikini? / You better work bitch… now get to work bitch!” Sure, Spears is using shock value to her advantage, but she also suggests that to attain the things you want in life, specifically the ‘fame,’ you’ve gotta work for it.  That in itself is not shocking whatsoever.

Basically, the double entendre number is all about “work” effort, and no, not that kind of work that goes down on a pole.  Additionally, through the adversity, Britney seems to suggest continual hard work: “Hold your head high, fingers to the sky / They gon’ try and try ya, but they can’t deny ya…” Amen sista! “Work” shines brightly due to superb, danceable production, and a playful, energized pop star.  Again, that’s more than can be said of Britney Jean as a whole. 

12. Kendrick Lamar, “Bitch, Don’t Kill My Vibe”

Good Kid m.A.A.d City • Interscope • 2012

In the context of the 2012 masterpiece, good Kid, m.A.A.d. City, “Bitch, Don’t Kill My Vibe” translates Kendrick Lamar’s father’s ‘oldies’ reference from “Sherane a.k.a Master Splinter’s Daughter” (“Matter of fact, cut my motherfuckin’ oldies back on / You killin’ my motherfuckin’ vibe”) to soulful production, contributed by Sounwave. The production incorporates live strings, background vocals, and a Boom Clap Bachelors sample (“Tiden Flyver”).  While the record has soulful sensibilities, it also possesses a lush West Coast sound that’s been associated with the likes of Snoop Dogg and other West Coast hip-hop musicians.

On the chorus, Kendrick Lamar proclaims:

“I am a sinner, who’s probably gonna sin again
Lord, forgive me! Lord, forgive me
Things I don’t understand
Sometimes I need to be alone
Bitch, don’t kill my vibe!”

Basically, Lamar admits to his improprieties and ultimately wants/knows he should be a better person but knows he will fall short despite this. He also, doesn’t want to be compromised as an ‘individual’, hence a play on the line, “Bitch don’t kill my vibe.”  He brilliantly alters his voice and changes inflections, including moments when his flow is ultra-rhythmically contrived. “Bitch, Don’t Kill My Vibe” is one of many brilliant numbers on good Kid m.A.A.d City, an album that the Recording Academy totally screwed over – Macklemore and Ryan Lewis, really?

13. Lupe Fiasco, “Bitch Bad”

Food & Liquor II: The Great American Rap Album, Pt. 1 • Atlantic • 2012

Ah, we close out this bitching affair with a second consecutive hip-hop cut. “Bitch Bad” served as the second single from Food & Liquor II: The Great American Rap Album, Pt. 1 (2012), the fourth studio album by Grammy-winning rapper, Lupe Fiasco. “Bitch Bad” was produced by The Audibles and, while it’s arguably the album’s best cut, it’s also its most controversial.  The chorus is one of the simplest of the effort, but the meaning transcends simplicity, which is genius: “Bitch bad, woman good / Lady better, they misunderstood / (I’m killin’ these bitches) / Uh, tell ‘em, bitch bad / Woman good, lady better / They misunderstood / They misunderstood.”

As usual, everything has double and sometimes triple meanings with Lupe Fiasco.  The initial read upon hearing “Bitch Bad” is that he is scolding parents for promoting free ‘endearing’ use of a formerly derogatory reference towards women. At the same time, he plays on the word when he states, “I’m killin’ these bitches.”  You can interpret the ‘killing’ being (1) outrapping the competition as well as (2) trying to atone for and eliminate the derogatory reference to women.

“Now, I ain’t trying to make it too complex
But let’s just say shorty has an undeveloped context
About the perception of women these days
His mama sings along, and this what she says
‘Niggas, I’m a bad bitch, and I’m bad, bitch!
Somethin’ that’s far above average.’
… Couple of things are happenin’ here
First, he’s relatin’ the word bitch with his mama, comma
And because she’s relatin’ to herself
As most important source of help
And mental health, he may skew respect for dishonor.”

Sigh, there is plenty to analyze and digest, but “Bitch Bad” is incredibly clever, and compared to some of the songs on this particular list, it truly does have thoughtful message, at least to some degree.