11 Totally Relatable Songs About Exes features music courtesy of Dua Lipa, Jeremy Zucker, Joji, ROSALÍA & Ty Dolla $ign.

[otw_shortcode_dropcap label=”“T” size=”large” border_color_class=”otw-no-border-color” shadow=”shadow” square=”square”][/otw_shortcode_dropcap]ell me, who I have to be / To get some reciprocity.” Ah, YES, those timeless lyrics hail from one of the great classics about exes, “Ex-Factor” by Grammy-winning hip-hop/R&B musician, Lauryn Hill. Even north of two decades since the release of The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill (1998), both the album, and that particular song carry ample weight.  Focusing only on the song itself, “Ex-Factor” is a prime example of the plight of love, as well as how potent songs incorporating break ups can truly be.  At one point, Hill sings, “And when I try to walk away / You’d hurt yourself to make me stay / This is crazy.” Crazy indeed Ms. Lauryn Hill, but, again, exes and broken-off relationship serve among the preeminent topics in music regardless of genre.

Go throughout the course of musical history, and songs about exes and broken relationships are countless.  Here, on 11 TOTALLY RELATABLE SONGS ABOUT EXES, we’ve merely scratched the surface.  This is not a definitive list, but there are some truly worthwhile gems that encompass the plight of love.  11 TOTALLY RELATABLE SONGS ABOUT EXES features music courtesy of Dua Lipa (“Don’t Start Now”), Jeremy Zucker (“Julia”), Joji (“Run”), ROSALÍA (“Dolerme”), and Ty Dolla $ign (“Ex”).  Without further ado, prepare to totally relate to these totally retable songs about EXES!

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1. Dua Lipa, “Don’t Start Now”

Future Nostalgia • Warner • 2020

“Did the heartbreak change me? Maybe / But look at where I ended up / I’m all good already / So moved on, it’s scary / I’m not where you left me at all…” Back in October 2019, Dua Lipa returned with an electrifying, energetic single, “Don’t Start Now”, which ultimately appears as the second track on her sophomore album, Future Nostalgia. Lipa describes the song to Apple Music stating that it “Is a perfect breakup song, about when you finally find your feet and then somebody decides to come crawling back just when you’ve moved on.”

“Don’t Start Now” has all the makings of a pop bop, period – the epitome of a totally awesome song! The groove is infectious, instantly a catalyst for foot tapping, head nodding, and busting a move on the dance floor.  Further cementing the bop status are other elements of the production – robust bass line, keyboards, and synths (including strings).  Stylistically, “Don’t Start Now” can be characterized to some extent as a nu-/neo-disco single – a pop single incorporating dance and R&B cues.

All those positives don’t even capture additional greatness characterizing “Don’t Start Now.” First and foremost, Dua Lipa continues to impress with her husky, expressive lead vocals.  She has a distinct instrument that is ready made for pop superstar status.  Beyond that, the songwriting is catchy and quite engaging.  The focal point is matters of the heart, specifically rejecting the ex who ultimately said goodbye to her:

“Don’t show up, don’t come out
Don’t start caring about me now
Walk away, you know how
Don’t start caring about me now.”

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2. Niall Horan, “Arms of a Stranger”

Heartbreak Weather • Capitol • 2020

“When I was on my knees in the darkness / Yeah, you’d be there to break my fall / But now, I’m lyin’ so helpless / But somehow, I just still want more.” Sigh, “Arms of a Stranger” ranks among the highlights of Heartbreak Weather, the 2020 sophomore album by Niall Horan. Here, Horan realizes his relationship is over and done with, but he’s still coping, trying to figure out his next, meaningful move.

The emphasis is on ‘meaningful’ as Niall doesn’t feel the same way about the ‘strangers’ he’s associating with in order to move on from ‘true love.’  Clearly, he was dedicated to his ex, so much so that on the first verse he asks, “If we’re not gonna do this honestly / Baby, won’t you give me back what you took apart?” Horan’s pain is authentic on the epic chorus, as he sings vulnerably, “You left me with nothing / Now I’m lyin’ in the arms of a stranger / But why do I think of you?” Sigh, it feels so wrong for listeners to be ‘tickled fancy’ by Horan’s pain – oh, the schadenfreude! “Arms of a Stranger” previously appeared on the playlist, 11 Stranger Songs Totally Worth Spinning.

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3. The Chicks, “Gaslighter”

Gaslighter • Columbia • 2020 

Prior to their 2020 comeback, the last time we’d heard from The Chicks, as the leading artists, was back in 2006.  Back then, Natalie Maines and company were Taking the Long Way, and “Mad as hell” because they weren’t “Not Ready to Make Nice”.  Taking the Long Way would win the country collective four Grammy awards, including Album of the Year. After an extended hiatus, the ladies came back strong  “Gaslighter”, which ranked among the awesome songs that tickled my fancy in March 2020.

“Gaslighter, denier / Doin’ anything to get your ass farther / Gaslighter, big timer / Repeating all the mistakes of your father.” “Gaslighter” is an electrifying country record, plain and simple –#LIT.  Opening with powerful, piercing harmonized vocals, the tone is set early on by Dixie Chicks.  Set in a major key, producer Jack Antonoff constructs a potent, country/folk backdrop for the girls to ‘do work’ on.

“Gaslighter” seems to be about a failing relationship that includes deception and most pertinent to Natalie Maines, divorce.  “You thought I wouldn’t see it if you put it in my face / Give you all my money, you’ll gladly walk away,” she sings on the second verse, continuing, “You think it’s justifiable, I think it’s pretty cruel / And you know you lie best when you lie to you.” The rest of the chorus, excerpted earlier, goes something like this:

“Gaslighter, you broke me
You’re sorry, but where’s my apology?
Gaslighter, you liar.” 

Plain and simple, “Gaslighter” is the blueprint for executing a comeback.  The Chicks have always been known for their attitude, and they exhibit plenty of attitude throughout this three-and-a-half-minute bop.  Angry Natalie Maines is the best in all honesty. Fancy tickled!

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4. Bad Bunny, “Si Veo a Tu Mamá”

YHLQMDLG • Rimas Entertainment • 2020

After impressing with standouts “Vete” and “Ignorantes”, Puerto Rican Latin trap artist Bad Bunny (Benito Antonio Martínez Ocasio) dropped his second studio album, YHLQMDLG – Yo Hago Lo Que Me De La Gana (“I do what I want”) –  in 2020.  Backtracking slightly, Ocasio proved that he was a star on his Grammy-nominated debut album, X 100PRE, making the Urbano Latino style quite compelling. Focusing on the album at hand, YHLQMDLG, we specifically dissect the pretty sweet record, “Si Veo a Tu Mamá.”

“I don’t know why the hell I fool myself / Saying I forgot you, when I miss you…” “Si Veo a Tu Mamá” commences YHLQMDLG brightly and energetically in a major key.  On this sleekly produced number (Subelo NEO and Elikai), it’s the classic scenario of ‘I’m not over my ex.’ As to be expected, Bad Bunny references missing the sex early on, as well as letting lots of things in life fall by the wayside because of his depression essentially.

“I still love you
But I know it’s a mistake
Because you don’t love me anymore
And without you, I do better
And if I see your mom
I ask her about you
To see if you have someone
Someone that makes you happy.”

“Si Veo a Tu Mamá” previously appeared on the playlist, 15 S Songs Selected with No Rhyme or Reason as well as being selected among Awesome Songs That Tickled My Fancy: March 2020.

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5. ROSALÍA, “Dolerme”

“Dolerme” • Columbia • 2020

“For all those times I put myself second / And I changed what I wanted for you what you wanted…” Grammy-winning Latin pop musician ROSALÍA is awesome to the nth degree.  After killing it on her previously released 2020 single, “Juro Que”, she’s on-point once again on “Dolerme”.  “Dolerme” serves as another great example of the sheer artistry of the Spanish singer/songwriter.  It’s always fascinating to read the translations of a Spanish exclusive record.  “Dolerme” certainly possesses its fair share of colorful lyrics, with ROSALÍA possessing the personality to sell these lyrics.  On “Dolerme,” she sings about her EX.

On the pre-chorus, she’s blunt AF: “Those bitches you got now, baby, they don’t know / What awaits them…” Da-yum!  On the chorus, the ‘hurt’ inflicted upon her seems too shift from him to her:

“I don’t know why he doesn’t want to hurt me anymore
I accelerate to see if I can crash
I want you to see it, don’t try to stop me

And so, you can show me that you could forget me…”

Wow. In addition to the lyrics, “Dolerme” is quite sublime in about every other way.  From a vocal standpoint, ROSALÍA owns her upper register, sounding incredibly refined and sweet. Musically (instrumentally), the Grammy-winner is backed by a chill production, led by rhythmic guitars.  Honestly, it’s all pretty compelling. Sure, she’s emotional as albeit – hurt, angry, and sad – but her pain is our listening pleasure, as messed up as that may sound.

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6. Jeremy Zucker, “Julia”

“Julia” • Republic • 2020

Following terrific standout singles “Always, I’ll Care” and “not ur friend”, ascending pop singer/songwriter Jeremy Zucker delivers his best single of 2020 with “Julia”,  where he reminisces on a now defunct relationship. “Julia” is true to Zucker’s style – it’s never overblown or overwrought regarding the production, sound, or even the vocal performance.  Even though it never gets too high, “Julia” never sounds safe, stoic, or underwhelming; there’s a great sense of balance and space. Zucker does a terrific job using space on this nearly four-and-a-half-minute record, balancing cooler and warmer moments.

“You saw me sing last week / I was hopin’ you might ask / ‘Is this one about me?’ / but how could you just say nothin’ at all?” Thematically, as aforementioned, matters of the heart drive “Julia.” Zucker recalls a relationship, with Julia that’s no more. “Julia, I’m through with ya,” he sings on the chorus, adding, “Thought we’d never see the sun fade / Now we’ll never see that shit shinin’ / Did we use to fear the dark days / ‘Cause now I’m dancin’ in the moonlight…” Poetic, expressive, and emotional to say the least.  Though I mentioned the balance, it should be noted that Zucker does rise to the occasion vocally when the oomph feels right. Similarly, the music does the same. “Julia” is another winner from Jeremy Zucker.  The personal nature of this record is quite relatable, while the name of the ex-lover is unimportant. Still, Julia has quite a nice ring to it.

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7. Jhené Aiko, “None of Your Concern (Ft. Big Sean)

Chilombo • Def Jam • 2020

On “None of Your Concern,” which previously graced the playlist, 11 Songs Filled with Overwhelming Worries, Jhené Aiko makes it clear her ex should not be concerned about her in the last.  “None of Your Concern” appears on her third studio album, Chilombo, released in 2020.  Of the album, Aiko told Carl Lamarre of Billboard, “In a sense, I am a like a volcano and this album is an eruption.” Fair enough.  While the album, as a whole, ends up being too long Aiko does a nice job of expressing feelings in the aftermath of a breakup, healing, and ultimately, working towards moving forward.  “None of Your Concern,” which features her ex-boyfriend, Big Sean, marks one of the key moments from Chilombo.

Worth noting, the second song on Chilombo, “Triggered (freestyle),” which precedes “None of Your Concern,” has been speculated to have been directed towards Big Sean.  Regardless, keeping our eye on the prize, there’s no doubt whatsoever that Aiko and Sean address their now defunct relationship and moving beyond on “None of Your Concern.” Obviously, from Aiko’s perspective, “It’s none of your [his] concern anymore,” considering they’re not an item anymore.  As for Sean, he cites his problems, the electrifying sex they once had, and states, “I only want the best for you, movin’ forward.”

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8. Joji, “Run”

“Run” • 88rising / 12Tone Music • 2020

Joji (George Miller) returned with a fresh new single, “Run” in 2020, one that certainly tickled my fancy in the month of February. “Run” features production by Justin Parker, who also co-writes with Joji and Daniel Wilson.  Rather than embracing the R&B vein he opted for on BALLADS 1 (2018), “Run” takes on more of an alternative pop vibe. It’s quite a compelling contrast.  Rather than rely on keyboards and synths, Miller is backed by electric guitar.

Furthermore, it’s also alluring to hear Joji sing in falsetto, flaunting his upper register on the chorus where matters of the hearts dominate:

“I know you’re not in love, like you used to be
Guess I’m not the one, like you used to think
So, you just run
I know that I’m stuck in this misery
Guess I’m not enough, like you used to think
So, I’ll just run.”

The lyrics are emotionally charged, with reminiscence of a now defunct relationship fueling the fire. “I fell for your magic, I tasted your skin,” he sings on the first verse, continuing, “And though this is tragic, at least I found the end.”  On the second verse, he asks, “Will I pay my dues? / Your love was a mystery / Yeah, my love is a fool / And I travel the country just to get to you.” It seems that Joji, as well as his ex-lover are ‘running’ away from past emotions, etc.  That said, you won’t dare ‘run’ away from “Run!” It’s superbly produced, gorgeously performed, features a memorable chorus and emotionally charged, relatable lyrics.

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9. Lil Peep, “Sex with My Ex”

Come Over When You’re Sober, Pt. 2 • Columbia • 2018

Sadly, emo-tinged rapper Lil Peep passed away at the age of 21 on November 15, 2017. Although the heavily tatted, often ‘sad’ rapper is no longer living, his posthumous, full-length album, Come Over When You’re Sober, Pt. 2, arrived in November 2018.  One of the best moments from the LP comes by way of the dramatic, incredibly ‘emo’ “Sex with My Ex.”

On the ‘passionate’ chorus, he asserts, “Fuck me like we’re lyin’ on our deathbed / I can feel that sudden emptiness / I’m here to grant you one last wish.” He follows with one relatively simple, but effective verse, later repeated.

“I don’t know when I’ll be back in town (Back in town)
All I know is that she’ll wait around, for me
All I know is that she’ll hold me down (All I know is that she’ll hold me down)
My girl keeps all ten toes on the ground, for me
I can feel it, I can feel it now
I can feel you watchin’ after me, holdin’ my breath.”

There’s also an interesting bridge, where he sings, “Catch a feelin’ / Catch a feelin’ now / I still feel your skin all over me / Sex with my ex.” “Sex with My Ex” previously appeared on the playlist 20 Songs All About ‘Doin’ It’ – Hmm, wonder what that list was all about?!?!

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10. Ty Dolla $ign, “Ex” (Ft. YG)

Beach House 3 • Atlantic • 2017

“I just text my main chick / I told her I ain’t coming home / I just text my main chick / I told her, I ain’t coming home, tonight.” “Ex” commences lushly, foreshadowing a sexual tilt.  After dropping his signature runs in a robust vocal tone, Ty Dolla $ign informs us of exactly where he’s going with the standout from his 2017 album, Beach House 3. Following a slow intro, he drops the centerpiece of – the chorus (aforementioned).

Expectedly, it’s catchy AF, setting up a groovy, fun, carefree joint.  On his verse, he focuses on the past, hooking up with his ex.  As for YG, who arrives for the second verse, he could care less about any exes.

“Give my last to these naked bitches
Leave your main squeeze for these naked bitches, yeah
That’s how you know, when it’s all bad
She call me or text, I could call back
But she imagine in her head I’m doing all that
I tell her I’m not, she like, ‘YG, you a thot.’”

All in all, it’s a brief, but enjoyable record.

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11. Little Mix, “Shout Out to My Ex”

Glory Days • Sony Music • 2016

Girl pop group Little Mix returned with a bang in the fall of 2016. After dropping an acronym for being horny (“A.D.I.D.A.S.”) and created buzz with “Hair”, they go for the kill, tackling their exes.  Little Mix throws mad shade at their exes in “Shout Out to My Ex” which served as the promo single for 2016 album, Glory Days. What created a stir about the song at the time were the references to Zayn, who dated Perrie Edwards for four years.  Fittingly, Edwards kicks off the ex-slaughter fest.

Edwards begins respectably, singing:

“This is a shout out to my ex
Heard he in love with some other chick
Yeah, yeah, that hurt me, I’ll admit
Forget that boy, I’m over it.”

That excerpt represents familiar, relatable feelings that exes feel towards one another.  The juiciest part follows with the second half of the verse.

“I hope she gettin’ better sex

Hope she ain’t fakin’ it like I did, babe

Took for long years to call it quits

Forget that boy I’m over it.”

Edwards seems to throw some serious shade at Zayn, asserting he’s lousy in the bed and that the relationship was a waste of time.  The personal, feisty lyrics that initiate “Shout Out to My Ex” make it truly intriguing – break out the popcorn! After a fiery first verse, the girls sum up their scornful feelings on the chorus:

“Shout out to my ex, you’re really quite the man

You made my heart break and that made me who I am

Here’s to my ex, hey, look at me now

Well, I, I’m all the way up

I swear you’ll never bring me down.”

Essentially, the girls consider their exes assholes – keeping it 100.  The tone is sarcastic through and through.  Amplifying the sarcasm is how fun the song is conceived to be.  It’s set in a minor key and the energy is tremendous.  The girls are happy to be rid of their respective exes (“Oh, I deleted all your pics / Then blocked your number from my phone”), but also sorry that they wasted their time.

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11 Totally Relatable Songs About Exes [Photo Credits: 12Tone Music, 88rising, Atlantic, Brent Faulkner, Capitol, Columbia, Def Jam, The Musical Hype, Pexels, Pixabay, Republic, Rimas Entertainment, Warner]

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