King Missile, Detachable Penis | Wacky Wednesday

In the ninth edition of Wacky Wednesday (2025), we break down the unique song, “Detachable Penis” performed by King Missile.

Do you know what day it is? It is Wednesday, folks! Do you know what that means? Why, it is Wacky Wednesday! In the spirited column Wacky Wednesday, we analyze, break down, and explore songs from various musicians of various genres that can be considered unique, unusual, or ‘wacky.’  These songs can be new or old; the only requirement is that they ‘catch the ears’ because of their distinctiveness.  So, with the background established, in the ninth edition of Wacky Wednesday (2025), we break down the unique song, “Detachable Penis” performed by King Missile. Wacky Wednesday vibes commence!

“Even though sometimes it’s a pain in the ass, I like having a detachable penis.”  To each his own, King Missile. While many songs reference penis in some form or fashion, it’s not every day the penis is featured in the song title, let alone the entire song is about it.  King Missile is an avant-garde, art-rock band, so, nonconformity is welcomed. In the case of “Detachable Penis”,  the penis is the star of the show.  “Detachable Penis” is the eighth track from the band’s 1992 album,  Happy Hour. The music ‘cooks’ throughout the song.  The jagged, distorted guitar riffs and organ are fierce.  The music itself is not odd.  The theme and lyrics, however, ‘take the cake’ on “Detachable Penis.”

So, why is the penis detachable? Well, that’s a valid question that never gets answered.  At the beginning, the listeners are informed of a missing peen…

“I woke up this morning with a bad hangover, and my penis was missing again. This happens all the time; it’s detachable.”

Mercy.  We listen, and we don’t judge. From there, we get this ‘song and dance’ regarding searching for the missing, detachable penis, which we assume is NOT a dildo.  A prosthetic?

“I was starting to get desperate. I really don’t like being without my penis for too long; it makes me feel like less of a man, and I really hate having to sit down every time I take a leak.”

After searching for the ding-a-ling, the narrator finds it:

“So, I went to the Kiev and ate breakfast. Then, as I walked down Second Avenue towards St. Mark’s Place, where all those people sell used books and other junk on the street, I saw my penis lying on a blanket next to a broken toaster oven. Some guy was selling it–I had to buy it off him. He wanted twenty-two bucks, but I talked him down to seventeen.”

Did I mention we listen, and we don’t judge already? All the while these shenanigans occur, there are sung vocals.  Can you guess the lyrics? If you came up with “detachable penis,” you are in business.  A 1990s classic, “Detachable Penis” is an odd, odd song that never grows old.

King Missile // Happy Hour // Atlantic Recording Corp. // 1992

King Missile, Detachable Penis: Wacky Wednesday No. 9 (2025) [📷: Brent Faulkner / The Musical Hype; Atlantic Recording Corp.; Rich The Barber Font from Font Space; Wendel Natan from Pexels; AcatXlo, OpenClipart-Vectors from Pixabay]